Could boredom actually be good for children? In a world where screens, games, videos and notifications can fill almost every spare moment, perhaps giving children time to do nothing is more important than we realise.
On 15 June, discussions about children’s use of social media returned to the headlines following the government’s announcement that it was considering restricting access to social media for under-16s.
Whether those plans become reality or not, they raise an important question for all of us as parents, teachers and professionals working with children:
What might children be missing when every quiet moment is filled with entertainment?
For me, this isn’t really a debate about phones.
It’s a conversation about childhood.
Technology Isn't the Enemy
Before going any further, I should probably say this: I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with technology.
Like many people, I use my phone every day for work, keeping in touch with friends, learning new things and managing life. Technology has transformed the way we live in countless positive ways.
In fact, I have two phones. My work phone is only switched on during working hours, and my personal phone doesn’t have any work apps or social media on it. It’s one of the ways I try to create a healthier balance between work and home life.
Technology isn’t necessarily something we should fear, and I’m certainly not suggesting that children should grow up without it, but I do think it’s worth asking whether we’ve unintentionally lost some opportunities for children to experience something surprisingly valuable:
boredom.
When Every Moment Is Filled
One small habit has become really important to me. Each morning, I sit with a cup of coffee, look out of my front window and do… nothing.
No emails. No social media. No podcasts. No television.
Just a few minutes of quiet.
It gives my brain time to wake up, notice how I’m feeling and prepare for the day ahead. It’s amazing how calming those few minutes can be.
Then I started wondering: How often do children get that opportunity?
For many young people, a spare moment can quickly be filled with scrolling, videos, games or notifications.
Waiting for a bus. Walking home. Sitting in the car. Standing in a queue. Waiting for an appointment. Even moments of quiet at home can be filled almost instantly.
I’m not suggesting that every minute of screen use is harmful. But when children rarely experience periods without stimulation, they have fewer opportunities to discover what happens when there is nothing immediately demanding their attention.
Why Boredom Matters for Children
As adults, we often see boredom as something negative. Children certainly do. But boredom actually serves an important purpose.
When children don’t have constant entertainment, their brains begin to create.
They imagine. They problem solve. They daydream. They explore their surroundings. They reflect. They invent games. They learn to entertain themselves. They process emotions.
Many of us probably remember long summer holidays making dens, reading books, riding bikes, playing outside or simply finding ways to entertain ourselves because there wasn’t another option.
Those experiences weren’t wasted time. They gave us opportunities to develop creativity, independence and resilience. And perhaps that’s something today’s children need too.
What We See in Our Work With Children
At Emotionally Healthy Minds, we support children and young people experiencing anxiety, emotionally based school avoidance (EBSA), low confidence, emotional regulation difficulties and other barriers to learning.
Every child is different, and technology is rarely the sole cause of the difficulties a child experiences. However, we increasingly meet young people who find quiet moments difficult. Some describe feeling uncomfortable when there isn’t something happening or something to occupy their attention.
Alongside this, we can see challenges around:
- Sustaining attention
- Managing frustration
- Emotional regulation
- Coping when things become difficult
- Resilience
- Face-to-face communication
- Coping with uncertainty
Technology isn’t necessarily causing these difficulties, but constant stimulation may leave fewer opportunities for children to practise the skills that naturally develop through quieter moments and real-world experiences.
This Isn't About Taking Phones Away
I don’t think the answer is banning technology completely. Children need to learn how to use technology safely and responsibly because it is going to remain a significant part of their lives. The challenge is helping children find balance.
Helping them discover that not every moment has to be filled.
Helping them become comfortable with silence.
Helping them realise that boredom isn’t something to fear.
Giving them opportunities to experience the world without a screen competing for their attention.
This is particularly important for children who already experience anxiety, emotional dysregulation or difficulties with attention and transitions. For some children, stepping away from a highly stimulating activity can itself feel difficult, so changes may need to be gradual and supportive.
Questions Worth Asking Ourselves
Rather than asking only:
“How much screen time is too much?”
Perhaps we could also ask:
Does my child have opportunities to experience boredom?
Do they spend time outdoors without a device?
Can they sit quietly with their own thoughts?
Do they have time to read, create, imagine or simply do nothing?
These experiences might be more valuable than we realise.
Perhaps Children Need More Time to Simply Be
Whether or not future legislation changes children’s access to social media, the wider conversation is one worth having. Technology has brought incredible opportunities, and it is here to stay.
Perhaps one of the greatest gifts we can give children isn’t another app, another video or another notification. Perhaps it’s permission to slow down.
To be quiet.
To look out of the window.
To let their minds wander.
And every now and then…
To simply be bored.
Supporting Children's Emotional Wellbeing
At Emotionally Healthy Minds, we believe emotional wellbeing and learning are closely connected.
We support children and young people across Essex with emotion coaching, counselling and emotionally informed tutoring, alongside support for parents, carers and schools.
If you’re concerned about your child’s anxiety, confidence, emotional wellbeing or ability to engage with learning, get in touch for an informal conversation about how we may be able to help.
